PRESSURE. BRILLIANCE. DON'T WANT TO DO THINGS, YET HATE TO NOT DO THINGS.
I do not believe we were designed to conform to a world made either by ourselves or others which says that in order to get it right we have to do it right and yes,
just like that.
People are are wired according to the standard, sure.
But for some of us?
It is what you've always known it to be.
We are not meant to HAVE to, because the lens we have been given is one which, so long as we allow it, causes us to see without our eyes, pluck dreams from the skies, and simply KNOW
what the next move is.
If you want a neurological explanation for this it's simply:
Your brain gets so worn out trying to keep up with the endless possibility you DO see and observe that you NEED to rely on intuition more in order to survive, and therefore, so long as you learn to do this, encourage it in yourself and see it as a good thing, you can expect to have and be able to ACT on an ability to sense which seems miraculous, supernatural, brilliant, bizarre, even scary.
Really it's just sharpened sensing.
If you want a supernatural explanation for it, ALL humans are wired for the supernatural and some apparently more so.
PS yes there is a gene for this, and yes it can be activated or not. But in short: some people just have the brilliant creator imprint, and they were not MADE for normal.
If this is you, and you are leaning IN to it ... (as opposed to dumbing or numbing it with addictions 'good' or otherwise) ...
you will simultaneously feel brilliant, and inept
you will crave pressure in order to be able to produce anything truly of value (because it activates your knowing and 'seeing'),
yet hate that you continually feel so much pressure to be, do, produce, be on top of, EVERYTHING
you will not be able to STAND having to DO things,
yet you will also feel lost, bereft, useless, adrift, and just not STAND when you don't DO things ...
and you are at very real risk of spending your entire life blaming and shaming yourself for not being properly normal, but also for not being as weird and wild and brilliant as you should be.
And let's not even mention the fact that you'll likely live with a continual trail of things you didn't complete yet absolutely could or even SHOULD have behind you, because on some level you believe that if you actually finished or were on top of all this possibility ...
what would even the point be of anything?
YES I'M TALKING TO YOU.
(The door is that way if I'm not :))
You can put whichever label on it you like, if you find that helpful, if it vindicates you or eases you in some way, but you will still have to figure out how to flow with you being you.
In the end, I think that's the crux of what we are all here to do, namely:
1) Find God
2) Find ourselves
(And no. I don't at all believe it is possible to do it the other way around, because true identity is IN God).
The thing you gotta realise is that when it comes to the finding of self bit ...
you must must must religiously and relentlessly throw out, like a nonsense omnibus cake out the window, any and all CONSTRUCTS which tell you that 'this is how it should look'.
That if you were really being an upright human, such and such things would be attended to in your life.
Maybe they would,
maybe they wouldn't,
but you can very easily spend the entire next 3-5 decades, or whatever you have left, (feel free to add a few if you're outraged at my assumption!) making sure you tidy and press edges which NOBODY EVER SAID WERE YOURS TO ATTEND TO.
So to speak.
Instead, you just accepted the assignment of a people group you were not wired to belong to, a way of being or creating or making which was never FOR you, and a mis-taken idea of flow which could never fit you!
Can I tell you?
There is a flow which is a true flow, a God-given you flow, an only could BE for you flow, and it's one you will find when you surrender to what it is that is planted IN you.
I'm talking about the dreams which always were ...
The drifting which perpetually occurs when you forget what you're supposed to be doing (or being) ...
The yearning for a different way
a simpler way
a softer more surrendered way
a fierce revelatory spiky this just HAPPENED way
an outpouring which is SHOCKING way
a turnaround which can't BE way
a flick of a switch to all of a SUDDEN be way
and the fact that all of this just
WORKS
like a beautiful tapestry made by God Himself
(which it is)
when you stop trying to MAKE it work
make sure YOU are working
or concern yourself what it would look like IF it were to work
I'm talking about the fact that at some point?
You're going to have to take your hands off of the 'lemme just figure this out or do it right' wheel,
also stop trying to make your outcomes dance like monkies in order to prove or validate something,
and just JUMP HEAD FIRST INTO THE FLOW OF WHAT IT WOULD BE RIGHT NOW IF YOU DIDN'T KNOW THERE WAS A WAY YOU WERE MEANT TO BE.
This is about SO much more than just not being made for 9-5.
lol.
This is about:
It's okay to not be made for ANY of it.
And yes, in that, you can absolutely still trust that God can equip you for ALL of whatever it is that IS for you.
You don't gotta go and get fixed, adjusted, corrected, endlessly, so you can finally fold up into at least a few of the proper people boxes.
Or at least that's not what I've found useful to believe.
Instead, what you can do, is refuse refuse refuse to capitulate to ALL so-called rules, say yes to the FULLNESS of whatever God is showing you in THIS moment, meanwhile cast every care you got as fast as it comes up over to Him, and trust | know | expect HE will sort out and empower you for whichever human-y things have to be done along the way!
I mean ...
it's just an idea.
But if you know you just can't go ON like this,
whatever 'this' means,
and you know there is BRILLIANCE in you which needs unlocking,
(on repeat!),
which also fuels and activates you WHEN you allow it to come through,
I'd say your life might just depend on letting it.
Wouldn't you?
Maybe not your physical life.
But for sure,
the yes or no of the one God planted within you.
So in the end, same as everything, it's as simple and wonderful and crazy and frustrating yet oh-so-easy as this:
And then she just said yes,
Now don't forget -
Life is Now. Press Play.
Kat
PS.
Supernatural fire from heaven. MULTIPLE demonic deliverances (individual as well as corporate/group). Prophetic revelation, words, insight. Joy joy joy and a NEW lightness of the Spirit.
DESTINIES RE-RAILED RIGHTLY IN GOD.
We heard "reveal and release" and that is exactly what happened!
Heavenly language was released.
New gifts.
Weight was RELEASED.
I (and others) completely changed physically.
And so much more!
All in possibly one of the most breathless "I don't think I've ever felt this all over the place in what I'm saying yet thank you Lord YOU make it clear" trainings I've ever done leading up to it!
^^^ Just a little of what occurred in today's live DELIVERANCE training in The Secret Garden!
Honestly ... I don't even try to put into words most weeks what happens in The Secret Garden, because it's not even 0.01% possible, but in case you didn't notice -
It's the place to be in my space, and the low-cost membership God gave me, for the faith-led woman who wants to know all He HAS for her in business,
ministry,
DESTINY,
money,
and life.
